How confident do you feel about managing your emotions as a leader?
In my coaching work, I often hear from leaders that they are concerned that they won’t be able to lead a difficult team meeting, not because they don’t know what to say, but because they’re worried that they might cry, get upset, be dismissive, respond defensively, etc., in front of their teams.
And this is completely understandable. Management and leadership are incredibly emotional tasks. You are leading, guiding, and responding to emotional beings who are inspiring, complicated, committed, frustrating, inconsistent and insightful and everything in between, just like you are!
But research has shown that leaders who work on strategies to manage their emotions report feeling more confident in their ability to lead.
So as you prepare for those conversations, prepare also to respond to the emotions that might come up for you. How will you manage your frustration when your staff member does the thing that gets under your skin? How will you handle your defensiveness when your manager points out something you should have done differently?
Thinking through your potential reactions and having a plan to manage them (venting to a close friend or partner, taking a stress walk, writing down the conversation while you’re in it so that you can focus on listening rather than responding, etc.) will help you build confidence in your ability to address the situation calmly.
This does NOT mean stuffing emotions nor do I mean that managers and leaders must never show emotion. Not at all. But it does mean understanding yourself and your triggers and having strategies to manage your emotions so that you can focus on helping your team manage theirs.
Take time this week to reflect on the elements of your work that trigger your anger, frustration, defensiveness and develop strategies that might help you manage your emotions when those triggers come up.
Contact us below to talk further about ways that we can support you as you tackle this crucial element of leadership.